No I had not been discouraged. If anything, my current work has been the most upbeat job of my life. I have still yet to hear a single negative criticism (not that I perhaps have not deserved it), my daily responsibilities have been the most hectic but most fulfilling of my life, and the church loves us as though we were one of their own (even though, in a way, my wife is). Thus I can honestly say that thus far, after (yes, a mere) four months on the job I do not have a single complaint or regret. Thus when one of my elders walked by me Sunday morning and simply said, “You’re doing a good job,” it was encouraging in a way that I do not know that I can adequately explain.
I have heard the horror stories from other preachers about their relationships with their elders. It typically brings to mind the famous feud between the Hatfields and McCoys. The elders think the preacher is lazy and the preacher thinks the elders are out of touch. Meetings between the two resemble “knock down, drag out” fights. And generally speaking, both are unsatisfied, miserable, and overly critical about the efforts (or “lack thereof”) and general mindset of the other. Such is the complete and utter opposite of God’s pattern and expectations for the relationship between these servants of God.
Paul, in Acts 20, had a very open and candid conversation with the elders of the church in Ephesus. He had worked among these people for three years (vs. 31), daily teaching, exhorting, and when necessary rebuking the people of that city. Most any preacher can tell you that after three years with a congregation the “honeymoon” phase is over and the reality of the relationship that will exist between the preacher and his elders has long since set in. However, upon Paul’s departure, Luke records that after praying together the elders “all wept sore, and fell on Paul’s neck and kissed him, sorrowing most of all for the words which he spake, that they should see his face no more” (vs. 37-38). It is more common today for elders and preachers to weep tears of joy upon such a departure than genuine tears of sorrow. However, the relationship that existed between Paul and this eldership serves as a pattern for how the relationship between elders and preachers should exist today.
After more than ten years of local preaching work I am now serving under my first eldership. I must say from experience that the working environment compared between having elders and not having them are worlds apart. It is comforting to know that all the horror stories told by preachers and elders alike are not the case in every congregation. There are still some elders who stand by their preachers, love them, support them, mentor them, and even when they do not necessarily need it, provide just a little “pick me up!”
-Andy Brewer