No, we are not having problems. But this past weekend Kristy and I were privileged to attend the Great Smoky Mountain Marriage Retreat for the first time. We had wanted to attend in the past but could never make our schedule work out. So along with 1,000 other people we traveled to Pigeon Forge excited about a fun and informative weekend. We were not disappointed in that both speakers did an excellent job in giving practical instruction in a relaxed atmosphere.
Events like marriage retreats serve a vital function as tools of instruction and encouragement. God has placed a great deal of emphasis on the necessity of strength in our marriages from the love that is to be shared to the roles that we are to fill (Ephesians 5:22-33). However, the world has done a good job of throwing so many distractions at us that most often it is our homes and particularly our marriages that suffer the consequences. Marriage retreats and similar events serve as a tool to help us refocus our attention by temporarily blocking those distractions so that our relationships are refreshed and rejuvenated.
I fear, though, that in many people’s minds there is a certain enigma that has attached itself to marriage retreats. Sometimes when asked concerning their participation some will respond, “Why do we need to go to a marriage retreat? We aren’t having problems in our marriage!” Now granted, it is the case that marital enrichment programs like this can be most useful for those who are having problems. However, why do I have to have problems in my marriage to work on it? Do athletic teams practice only when they lose their talent? Do teachers encourage their students to study only when they reach a state of complete ignorance? Truth be told, when we truly care about our strengths, we do not wait until we become weak. We should be in a continual state of improvement in multiple areas of our lives, especially our marriages. Thus I am not ashamed to say that our marriage needed work, because all marriages need work on a daily basis so that we are reminded of the God-given and personally accepted responsibilities we have toward one another as husband and wife.
“Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband” (Ephesians 5:33).
-Andy Brewer