In recent weeks there has been a lot of public discussion about the home. Statements have been made by the highest ranking public officials about the home and that has stirred debate among the rest of us. What should constitute a home? How should a home function? What overriding emotions should a home be built upon? These are all questions that can and should be answered in an appropriate way, but the only manner by which that can be accomplished is to confer with the original guide to a happy home – the Bible. Is the home really hard to be understood or have we complicated it beyond recognition?
Title: The Home: Hard to be Understood?
Main Point: I’m a simple minded man – there are a lot of things I do not understand. I don’t understand paying a lot of money for blue jeans that already have holes in them. I don’t understand how being “cool’ became synonymous with being obnoxious. I don’t understand someone who would rather live in a run down shack simply so they can drive an overly expensive car. I don’t understand people who enjoy the “fringe benefits” of life while asking for assistance with necessities. There are some deep and complicated Biblical truths that can be more difficult to understand than others (2 Peter 3:15-16). But while there are a few things in life that are difficult to understand there are more that are not – chief among them is the home. Of all of God’s three institutions (church, government, home) I don’t know if any have been attacked heavier and more frequently than the home. It has been vicious and unrelenting. But while society has treated God’s design for the home as though it were hard to be understand it has introduced new designs and functions for the home that are hard for Christians to understand.
Discussion Points:
- Homes Where Children Run the Show – Ephesians 6:1-3 clearly reveals God’s design for authority in the home. Parents, for age sake, are supposed to be mature and competent decision makers. Children, for age sake, are supposed to take advantage of their parents’ maturity and learn from them. Man, however, has supplanted God’s plan by refusing to discipline and control their children, allowing them to rise in control of the home. Here I cite specific examples of such – look at www.medhelp.com. So many stories of child-rule can be traced back to unstable homes where parents have been negligent in presence, love, discipline, etc. Such accounts may not seem to be a big deal but the Bible’s position is very clear: Romans 1:29-30; 2 Timothy 3:1-2; Deuteronomy 21:18-21. Parents have to take back control of the home – its no wonder that children grow up and remain childish. They have never been taught otherwise.
- Homes Where Love is Not Present – Ephesians 5:25,33 – for a home to be successful, love must be present. Love, though, is much more than just an infatuation. Love is that self-sacrificial emotion which rules our interaction with others. Homes are now being built on everything but love. Social compatibility, money, notoriety, power, etc. are all replacing love as the overriding factor by which people are married. Love no longer rules our child rearing when we refuse to discipline, treat them as inconveniences, etc. When true and equal love is not present in our homes they are destined to fall short of God’s expectations. Examples of this are found in Genesis 25:28 (Esau was loved less by his mother and became a vagabond in the earth; Jacob was loved less by his father and became rebellious in Genesis 27) and Genesis 29:30 (Jacob married two women, loving Rachel more than Leah and trouble ensued among the wives and children. History has proven loveless homes to fail, yet man figures otherwise – it makes no sense.
- Homes Where Marriage is Defamed – Matthew 19:4-6 – God instituted, designed, and has great expectations in our marriages. Man, though, has defaced them. Matthew 19:4 – marriage includes one male and one female. Matthew 19:5 – married couples maintain independency from any other as an autonomous home. Matthew 19:6 – marriage is for a lifetime (with but one possible exception – vs. 9). Society’s evolution of the home has failed in each respect. Homosexuality has become an accepted “norm” in many minds – they forget Romans 1:26-27. More and more meddlesome parents are trying to control the lives of their children who have left their oversight and joined themselves to a spouse. Divorce including remarriage for any reason is running rampant in our land – they forget Matthew 19:9. Our homes must reflect the God of heaven who instituted and authorized marriage – some have wrested it to such a degree that it is now hard to understand.
The Bible is simple – it’s the ways of man that are hard to understand. God’s plan for the home is sure. If we would simply obey, its worth and value would be proven. Let’s help the world remember there is a better way – God’s way!
-Andy Brewer