Numbers speak, right? But even though numbers speak it is amazing what just a few can do. More specifically it is amazing what just one of some things can do. For instance, consider the potential power of one match. One little match made of wood and a phosphorus tip can burn away millions of acres and hundreds of years of natural vegetation. A single match can cause a family to lose the products of a lifetime of work and generations worth of memories. That one match can result in lives being lost, never again regained.
But those are all worst-case scenarios, because one little match can also produce the light to deliver a family from the darkness of a storm. It can light a stove to cook food for hundreds of hungry people. That one little match can also start a fire to warm a person that would otherwise freeze to death. What’s the difference? The negative or positive effects cannot be attributed to the matchstick itself, but instead to the way it was used.
In many ways words are like matchsticks because each can do good or do harm depending on how a person decides to use them. Think about the effects of just one little word…
One little word can stir up anger. “A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger” (Proverbs 15:1). Solomon says that when we are provoked that we should speak gently to them, give them good words, and they would be calmed. Gideon did this to Ephraim and the Bible says that their response was that “their anger against him subsided when he said this” (Judges 8:3). But when we use angry words why would we expect the response to be anything but anger in return (Judges 12:1-4a)?
One little word can wound the spirit. “The words of a whisperer are like delicious morsels; they go down into the inner parts of the body” (Proverbs 18:8; 26:22). Matthew Henry said that “tale-bearers (whisperers) are those who secretly carry stories…which perhaps have some truth in them, but are secrets not fit to be told, or are basely misrepresented.” These types of words can cut deep to the reputation, influence, and credibility of those about whom they speak, usually to irreparable harm. They can wound and they can kill.
One little word can hinder one’s hope. “Do you see a man who is hasty in his words? There is more hope for a fool than for him” (Proverbs 29:20). Here Solomon speaks of a hasty person who is rash in his judgments, a person who speaks without proper footing. This man is considered unwise and immature. The thoughtless words spoken by this type of person actually speaks more of himself than of the one that he criticizes.
One little word can uplift the disheartened. “Anxiety in a man’s heart weighs him down, but a good word makes him glad” (Proverbs 12:25). “To make an apt answer is a joy to a man, and a word in season, how good it is!” (Proverbs 15:23). What’s the greatest weapon against an evil word? A good word. Solomon says that a good word can cure the worst of anxieties and fix the damage done by evil. But it’s not always just about saying the right thing. Sometimes it’s about choosing the right time and the right way to say it.
One little word can open hearts. “Gracious words are like a honeycomb, sweetness to the soul and health to the body” (Proverbs 16:24). The way we say this is that “you can attract more flies with honey than vinegar.” Common sense says that a person would be more receptive to words of kindness and compassion than they would be to condescension. Or as Solomon also said “a word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in a setting of silver” (Proverbs 25:11).
James said that “the tongue also is a little member, and boasts great things” (3:5). If one little word can do all of these things and more maybe we need to be much more deliberate and thoughtful with what we say.
-Andy